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nativity photoshop border

(including a visit from the Three Wise Guys)

❄ ❅ ❆ Merry Christmas, everyone!
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Something a little different for today's pentultimate advent post: a bit of meta discussing my absolute favorite moment in all of Oz.

Perhaps surprisingly, it has nothing to do with Beecher/Keller. It's the moment in the season 2 episode "Animal Farm" when all the different groups of inmates join together to donate money to Rebadow so that his dying grandson can go to Disney World. Tumblr's ryan-oreily made a wonderful gifset of the sequence of scenes that make up the moment, which can be seen HERE. This is a screencap of it:

oz fave moment

I'm generally a feel-good kind of person (which is kind of ironic, given the nature of this show), and I found it incredibly touching that these hardened criminals could show so much compassion, that they still possessed the basic decency to do something so kind.

However, the first time I watched it, it was also with growing apprehension, because this was Oz. I kept waiting for something horrible to happen, for someone to rob Rebadow, or kill him, or for him to lose the money somehow. And then, sure enough, Wangler proposes to Adebisi that they steal the money, and I thought, "Here we go..."

BUT THEN

Adebisi (ADEBISI!! of all people) rejects Wangler's plan, explaining:



And THAT is when I lost it, and it made me realize how incredible this show was and how amazing its characters were. I loved how Fontana showed that someone as despicable as Adebisi could still have a conscience and a sense of humanity. That all the people in Oz, as horrible as they might be, were still people at heart.

This moment has always reminded me, in a roundabout way, of my favorite passage in "A Christmas Carol," when Scrooge's nephew says,
I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round... as a good time: a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time: the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe that it has done me good, and will do me good; and I say, God bless it!
I think, given recent political events, it is apparent that a lot of people still need to learn the lesson of this passage. I live in hope that the seasonal atmosphere of Christmas at least gives them pause to consider its message.
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A Christmas Miracle Remembered (an AU where I pretend that Toby was paroled at the end of Season 4, and Seasons 5 & 6 never happened)

Chris quickly shut the cabin door behind him, glad to be inside where it was warm. Leaning against the back of the door, he stomped and wiped the snow off his boots and onto the rug. It was second nature to him now—he’d heard more than enough lectures in his lifetime from Toby about tracking dirty slush across the hardwood floor.

He walked over to the fireplace and dumped his armful of logs into the empty bin, save one. He threw that log onto the dying fire and grabbed the poker. Crouching down, he used it to stir the fire until its flames were strong again. He tried to ignore the aches in his knees as he stood back up.

ExpandA Christmas Miracle Remembered, continued )
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(Okay, something had to give yesterday, and it ended up being Day 19's advent posting. Sorry about that!)

U-G-L-Y, You Ain't Got No Alibi

Sean pulled the sweater over his head and looked in the mirror. It was the ugliest thing he'd ever seen in his life.

"Oh, it looks great!" Tim said with a big smile. "All that green really brings out the color of your eyes."

ExpandU-G-L-Y, You Ain't Got No Alibi, continued )
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Crack the Whip

"Good grief," grumbled Toby. "Why is it taking you so long to get those skates on?"

Chris shrugged as he slowly swung a stocking-clad foot back and forth, trying to avoid the pool of melting slush under the bench. "These old laces don't look very strong," he observed. "What if one breaks?"

ExpandCrack the Whip, continued )
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mcmurphy snow gif

(I'm pretty sure they're holding hands under the border.)
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Miss Sally's Snowballs

"We have a very special day planned here at Miss Sally's Schoolyard!" Miss Sally proclaimed enthusiastically. "We're going to go outside for recess and play in the snow!"

The inmates all clapped in anticipation as they watched Miss Sally jump up and down in excitement.

ExpandMiss Sally's Snowballs, continued )
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The Perfect Tree (I'm not really sure where my mind was on this AU)

Toby paced through the lot, his boots making crunching sounds on the packed snow.

"I told you, we should've come here last weekend," he huffed. "These trees are pretty picked over."

ExpandThe Perfect Tree, continued )
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b:k early gift

(with apologies to Andy Samburg and Justin Timberlake)
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Tim's Great Idea (the timeline is a little wonky on this, so just roll with it)

It was Tim McManus's idea for the staff at Oz to join together to decorate a little tree in the break room. Not only would it be a fun way to celebrate the holidays, but it would also help foster a sense of community among the employees.

(He had heard that the staff at other prisons had done something similar with great success.)

ExpandA Great Idea, continued )
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The Discovery

A loud, crashing sound woke Ryan up. He froze for a moment as the possibilities ran through his mind. Then he realized that the stuffed parrot he'd won at the county fair last summer was jammed uncomfortably against his back. He picked it up and threw it over the edge of his bunk.

"Ryan?" Cyril whispered from below. Apparently the noise had woken him up, too.

ExpandThe Discovery, continued )
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Sucker!

Toby tried, but failed, to keep the grin off his face. He opened the door to the pod with a jerk and made a beeline toward Chris, lying sprawled out on his bunk.

Toby sat down next to him. "I've got a treat for you," he breathlessly informed Chris.

ExpandSucker!, continued )
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Poet's Carols

Poet turned up the volume on the kitchen radio. He got busy and began peeling the potatoes in time with the Christmas carol the station was playing. At first, he hummed along to the music, then he eventually broke out into his own version of the song…

Jingle bells,
Vern’s carcass smells,
As Robson laid a spoon.

The deal was sealed
by Keller's feels,
and Beecher got away!


ExpandPoet's Carols, continued )
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Food Porn (let's pretend this is a post-Oz AU)

"Stop it!" exclaimed Toby. He smacked the back of Chris's hand with his oven mitt. "Can't you read? It says right here on the package: Do not consume raw cookie dough."

"But it tastes so good," Chris replied defensively.

ExpandFood Porn, continued )
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Secret Santa Surprise

"Okay, we're all set," said Father Ray with a clap of his hands. "Everyone bring in their Secret Santa gifts by December 24 and place them here under the tree. We'll open them up at the staff party that afternoon."

Everyone began filing out of the break room, heading back to their posts. As Ray turned around to grab his cup of coffee, he realized that Gloria was lingering behind, still staring at the little slip of paper that she had drawn out of the hat.

ExpandSecret Santa Surprise, continued )
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Then he got an idea!
An awful idea!
Tobias BeeGRINCHer
GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!

(with apologies to Dr. Seuss and Chuck Jones)

October 2023

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